The Advisor

It’s me! I use magic to help with aiming your catapult. It will only use mana while you’re aiming. Also, if you didn’t notice, I’m kinda the only person who believes in you — so it would be nice if you brought me along!

The King

His Royal Highness use his Royal Haunches to block projectiles. He will help protect the keep as though his life depended on it (which it kinda does).

The Blacksmith

Uses his Magical Hammer to summon a powerful earthquake under the enemy. It’s certainly a hammer, and not a fart. (No matter what Clara says).

The Storm Mage

Summons a powerful Lightning Storm above the enemy. Some would say she would be of better use powering mechanical marvels that would launch us into the next age. But we don’t have time for that right now.

The Dragon

The fearsome Dragon can only be hit while she flies. She also hates wars and just wants to be friends with everyone. Unfortunately when she talks she sprays fire everywhere and ends up burning the enemy to the ground … Oh well.

The Hawk Rider

The massive hawk will destroy soldiers. She doesn’t work for us, it’s just super convenient the hawk needs a feed whenever we’re fighting.

The Warrior

William will teleport to your last shot projectile, fly through the air, does a spin attack and takes out the enemy. He also enjoys long walks on the beach and candle-lit dinners.

The Wizard

He summons a forcefield to protect anything nearby. We’d love for him to just do this constantly, but he said something like “That would make the game too easy” which was super confusing. But we don’t question wizards.

The Ice Queen

She’ll freeze the enemy’s catapult, slowing its reload speed and making it difficult to shoot. She’s also terrible on dates.

The Mirror Queen

She will reverse the controls on the enemy’s catapult which is sure to mess with their heads. As a side-note, she’s also unbearably vain.

The Dwarf

Increase the reload speed of your catapult and increases the pressure on men to grow long, luxurious beards.

The Archer

Shoots arrows at enemy soldiers. He’s kind of Legolas but without all the needless show-pony acrobatics.


The almighty evil villain who used dark magic to overthrow our King and cover our lands in darkness. His incredible power will zap your incoming missiles with electricity bolts and destroy them. Too bad he’s going to lose the battle against us … right?